In a Crooked little Cape Town

For those of you who didn’t experience the glory that is Billy Talent, you’re in luck, because I have everything you need to know and some pics too!

THE WARM UP WARM UP BAND

Friday night, as I suffered through the performance of the warm up band for Goodnight Wembley, who was the warm up band for Billy Talent at the Cape Town City Hall, I found myself wishing that I was back at the Gynecologist’s office (where I was earlier that day) – at least it was quiet. At first I thought I may have been a little biased because the lead singer looked like someone that I don’t like, but as it turns out, they did in fact suck. Some girls plugged their ears with toilet paper… and I followed suit.

eeenAll I could think of during their seizure inducing light show and the singer’s poorly executed attempt at channeling James Hetfield from Metallica was what a funny post this would be and how easy they’re making it for me. They played their second last song and some freaky looking dude, who thought he was Chester from Linkin Park, came onto the stage and screamed into the mic. Rolling my eyes just doesn’t seem to cut it But then he did the unthinkable – he moshed on the stage by himself and fell into a speaker. Karma really exists! I gave them a standing ovation… for exiting the stage!

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GOOD NIGHT WEMBLEY

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You might have heard a few of their songs on 5fm. I nearly fell dead on the floor when half the band members from the previous band came onto the stage again but felt at ease when I remembered that I know some of their stuff. The sound was much better and the singer didn’t drive me to contemplating suicide but by then, my headache from earlier the day turned into a throbbing death which may be the reason for me considering them to be kind of… mediocre.

Everything was pretty easy going until Francois Van Coke with his piss pot haircut made a guest appearance on the stage and everyone went nuts. Ai, man… there’s so much I can say but will cover everything in my conclusions at the bottom of this post.

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BILLY TALENT

We were lucky to get the front “cheap seats” on the balcony and we had an excellent view. We were at ease knowing that nobody would jump up in front of us and block our view and being civilized human beings we sat the hell down!

The lights dimmed and I was just about to fall asleep when Ginger pointed at a shadow backstage and my heart skipped a beat! Was I really seeing the band members of Billy Talent psyching themselves up before the show? INDEED!

The crowd went absolutely nuts and a sea of devil horns shot up into the air as the Canadian rockers entered the stage of a SOLD OUT show. Some of the fans right up front made a poster “Billy Talent Thank you for coming back as you promised” which Ben took as a memorabilia, I guess, and said “If there’s one thing about our band, it’s that we always keep our promises”. Cue “Aaaawww” and warm fuzzy feelings. Ah the Canadians are a humble people aren’t they?

Ben was an energizer bunny jumping around centre stage between the guitarist and the basest named Yum and Delicious. But if you’re going to get all factual on me, their real names are Ian D’Sa (Guitarist) & Jonathan Gallant (Basest).

On the left - Yum and on the right - Delicious

On the left – Yum and on the right – Delicious

Billy Talent is one of those bands that I kinda enjoyed before seeing them live, but am obsessed with now that I have seen them live. Their music style reminds me of a scene from “The corpse bride” and Ben is a creepy looking dude with a funny accent which transcends into my kind of sexy! Yes, I’m weird like that.

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Future Mr. Hipstyler

They didn’t have the capacity to put on a Lady Gaga caliber performance or use flame throwers like Rummstein but they had our full attention from the get go and we loved how they interacted with the crowd.

THE CAPE TOWN CITY HALL

I’ve never been inside the Cape Town City Hall until Friday night, but I see it every day from my office window. It’s an old building that sort of resembles an old style church and in my mind, I couldn’t place a rock band inside a place like this. But despite my doubts and the dodgy location I really enjoyed the show and could almost not believe how well-organised it was. Yes, it’s not a patch on the capacity of the Green Point stadium, but I would MUCH rather have artists come to places like these for the following reasons:

  1. I’m getting too old for this sh*t – I’ve been in the General standing area before and it sucks. Having to stand for hours on end and losing your place because you need the loo just so you can get a glimpse of the artist? Over it. I want my seat and a good view.
  2. It’s indoors – so the wind doesn’t take the sound away and there’s no chance of getting rained on.
  3. Security is tighter which means no more getting groped by stupid boys.
  4. There was enough space for everyone to move around and ladies room facilities were in excellent condition.
  5. There were enough bars and they were really close by.
  6. There were VIP boxes that looked pretty rad too

CONCLUSIONS

  1. You have to be a certain build if you want to wear skinny jeans… and the only person that pulled it off was Ben… that means you, Francois… please don’t wear it anymore.
  2. The wide leg stance is pretty effin rad. It accentuates the quads and makes you look like a rock god
  3. Boys are gross… and dumb…. Rephrase… boys in their early 20s are gross and dumb… especially when they’re drunk.
  4. If you think you’ve “made it” please don’t think that everyone thinks so. I won’t mention names but the coolest thing I’ve ever seen a South African musician do was when Kongos opened for Linkin park and Jack Parow made a guest appearance. They sang a redone version of the Beatles’ Come Together and when JP was done, he dropped the mic and walked off the stage in true Vanilla Ice style. I wasn’t a Jack Parow fan before but after that one show, I would proudly sport ‘n lang pet in honour of the King of Parow.
  5. Toilet paper comes in handy when you want to block your ears.
  6. A mosh-pit is no place for someone with breasts – thank the Lord I wasn’t in there.
  7. The basests are the sexiest musician in any band.
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One thought on “In a Crooked little Cape Town

  1. Pingback: Review: Billy Talent in Cape Town with Goodnight Wembly and Dead Lucky | janadidthis

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