I realise I’m going to get some flak for this post… I’m OK with that. But before everyone jumps on their hout perdjies, here’s why I’ve decided to it. I’m nowhere near to being ready to have kids and for the longest time, I thought I’m the only one in my generation that seems to have this crippling fear of settling down and having kids.
The other morning, in a moment of Monday-blues-induced-honesty, a colleague of mine admitted “I love my kids, but if I could go back, I wouldn’t have them. Your marriage is never the same; your life is never the same and you’re never the person you want to be.” I’ve never felt sorrier for someone in my entire life and it’s not because she was “stuck” with two kids, but because she felt horrible for resenting her kids. So, I dug a little deeper and asked her a little about what she did before she got married. The answer? Almost NOTHING. And I thought, “This might be your problem”.
So here’s what I suggest you do before you settle down and have kids:
- Take risks in your career/work in another country
- Be broke
- Spoil yourself – Fendi, Gucci, Prada, Guess, Nine West, Levi, Converse…. need to continue? You shouldn’t be asking “why”… just open that Edgars account and splurge!
- Study whatever you want to study – as many times as you like
- Get super-duper fit and really really hot… like… so hot that those 16 year olds be like “I wanna be her when I grow up”
- Work 2 jobs
- Discover yourself…. REALLY DISCOVER WHO YOU ARE. Here’s a useful link – 6 Tips to find yourself
- Rescue an animal
- Surf/rollerblade/bicycle/scooter/be in a band – do whatever activity it is that makes you feel like a kid again
By no means am I suggesting that kids hold you back from doing any of these things – I’m going to continue to do as many of these things should I decide to have kids. But for now, I’m quite happy being a 28/29 year old tween.